A CHAT

Confidence

Since 2020 lockdown I've lost confidence because I've been at home only going for walks or to the shops for essentials. Now it's 2021 there's still a pandemic but more things are slowly opening up such a clothes shops and charity shops. I haven't been anywhere out of town in ages I went to Braintree once in March but other than that I haven't been far at all. I want to get more confidence but I don't know how to as things are very different now. I have some confidence going to supermarkets because I've been going since lockdown 2020 but I don't have much confidence going other places and I haven't had any job interviews in a long time so they will be even harder.

Job Hunting

My last job was 2017 and since then I've had a handful of interviews but I either got a no or heard nothing (so rude when they do that) I didn't think I would struggle so much with finding a job even after I left school/college. I didn't get my first job until 2011 which was a Christmas one and that didn't last once it ended that was it. I always got palmed off with temporary Christmas jobs which don't last and they take advantage. After that things didn't really happen, I had interviews but nothing came of them. In 2015 I had yet another Christmas job and in 2017 I got another temp job. Since the nothing has happened I still get asked about training programmes and courses which I've done so many times and they're all the same.

Fragile X Syndrome

I have Fragile X Syndrome a learning disability and I struggle with my confidence and I can come across as shy and not very outgoing and while that isn't a problem as such it puts employers off.(ridiculous right? we've all gotta start somewhere?) They don't want to know but if they gave me a chance then they'd see I'm a good employee and I can do the job. I will come out my shell eventually if I was given a chance that's all I want a chance. It's even harder now since the pandemic took over in 2020 and a lot business closed down, people lost their jobs, there were job cuts and redundancies. I have no idea what I'm going to do and yes it does it worry me sometimes because I thought I would have a job by now. Will there be any jobs? will I get one? will there be any shops left? It's still bad now we're in 2021.

Friends 
I'm 30 now and I don't have friends so I spend most of my time by myself or my parents as I still live at home. I'd like to meet new people but again I'm not going anywhere anytime soon but I still feel lonely and I want to meet new people my age with similar interests. It's hard to make friends nowadays and I find it hard to be social. I've done a lot of college courses and I've met people but not people become good fiends with or anything. I also find it hard to be social online even though I'm behind a screen I don't really interact with things online or say my opinion on the news etc.

Thanks for reading.