FOCUS ON THE GOOD

It's sometimes hard to focus on the good when I feel like a failure because I can't get a job which I know isn't my fault. So I decided to write this post to focus on the good things.

I recently found Priscilla Block on YouTube (a singer)

Wearing colourful outfits always lifts my mood and I feel good

Going in the charity shops for bargains

Making scrapbooks

Re watching my favourite tv series- there's too many to list!

Reading true crime and space books

Wearing makeup

Organising my space/decluttering

Going out with my family

Solo shopping/lunch

Thanks for reading.

JOB HUNTING IN 2025

It's been a while since I've written a blog post so I thought I'd write one about job hunting in 2025 and how things are going. I don't really read blogs anymore so I don't expect this to get many views even if it gets a couple that will be okay.

My last paid job was 2024 which was only 4 weeks and there was no job after it which was very annoying! but now that shop has closed and is becoming another supermarket but I still didn't get a job there either. Job hunting is hard, disheartening, frustrating and tedious I apply for what I can, which is most of the time the same jobs/companies because they still advertise even after I've applied so I go round in circles. I do sometimes apply for other jobs but I know I won't be considered because I have no experience but I don't know what else to apply for. Some people have pointed out that I probably haven't got a job because I haven't had a permanent one which isn't even my fault when all I've had are either Xmas jobs or one that was only 4 weeks. That's such a stupid reason not to employ me.

I don't understand why I haven't got a job, I have all the skills, I'm capable and I want to work! I have a learning disability which shouldn't be a issue but sometimes it feels like it is. I've tried so hard over the years if I hadn't of had the job in 2024 my last paid job was 2017! yes that long ago it's ridiculous. I  really do try my best so there's not much else I can do other than keep plodding on and hope something comes along soon.

At times it gets me down but I try to be positive and keep busy with things such as my volunteering and my other group I attend. I don't know what more I can do? it's 2025 and I can't even a job which is ridiculous! I don't get how people can just get a job just like that. When I was on jobseekers I always got picked on for everything, they didn't help me, they don't help people with disabilities and I had awful work coaches it was horrible and I hate that I STILL have to go to the jobcentre or as I call it the place of doom. I first went when I left school or college one of them and I am still going there now and I absolutely hate it.

People keep saying something will come along and that gets annoying! (sorry if you're one of them!) I get what you mean but after a while it gets tedious. The job market right now is pants! it's changed so much over the years most retail places are closed or are closing or they have self checkouts so don't need as many people. I've been on many courses which at the time it was something to do! and I did learn more skills and knowledge but they haven't got me job. Over the years with the previous help I've had they never really knew what to do or suggest so the appointments were always the same.

Anyway that's all for now

Thanks for reading.

MY TOP TRUE CRIME DOCUMEMTRIES ON NETFLIX

I last posted one of these in 2019 and I thought I'd make a new one since there's so much more true crime on Netflix now. I can't put them all here but I will put the ones that are most interesting. I can't narrow it down to just 10!

Conversations with a killer: The Jeffery Dahmer tapes

Dahmer monster: The Jeffery Dahmer story

Exposed the ghost train fire

Crime scene: The vanishing at the hotel Cecil

American murder: Gabby Petito

Jailbreak love on the run

Sins of our mother

Worst roomate ever

American murder the family next door

American nightmare

Worst ex ever

What Jennifer did

Crime scene: The Times Square killer

I am a killer

Catching killers

Bad surgeon love under the knife

The most hated man on the internet

Confessions with a killer: The son of Sam tapes

Murder on the internet

Amy Bradley is missing

Cold case the Tylenol murders

Fred and Rose west a British horror story

A deadly American marriage

Poisonous Liaisons

Conversations with a killer the John Wayne Gacy tapes

The Ripper

Waco American Apocalypse

Missing dead or alive

Unsolved mysteries

Crime scene The Texas killing fields

Homicide Los Angeles

Memories of a murderer the Nilsen tapes

Confession tapes

Killer Sally

I just killed my dad

Unknown number the high school catfish 

Thanks for reading.

MY 2024 ROUND UP

I don't blog much anymore but I thought I'd write a 2024 round up I don't think people read blogs much anymore and I'm one of them but if this gets a few views then that's okay. I think overall 2024 has been good, some parts better than others but I am going to make sure I make 2025 even better!

January 

The month started of with a job at a supermarket which I got through my ECL employment helper this  was a 4 week trail thing with the promise of employment but there wasn't a job at the end which was very annoying. I saw the Wonka film which was good, I went volunteering and not much else happened in January.

February

After the 4 week work trail ended I started looking for another job, I had a few meetings but they didn't lead to anything. I had an interview for a care home job as a kitchen assistant but I was unsuccessful. 

March

I took part in more research, still plodding along with job hunting not much else happened this month.

April 

Me and my mum went to  a quilt exhibition with our neighbour, we went to cinnamon tree for my mums birthday and we went to Braintree village.

May

I voted, we went to Perry woods garden centre, I watched ride London go through the town, me and my mum went to the Green Dragon for a roast dinner.

June

Me and my mum went to Clacton on the bus, we had fish and chips, walked along the pier and the sea front. We had afternoon tea at Long Melford.

July

I went to music in the park with my mum, we went to Brightlingsea on the bus, we also went to Maldon both were good.

August

I went to Walton on the bus with my mum, we walked to Greenstead Green, work started on our new kitchen. We went to the bull for lunch and the Indian banquet.

September

I've been volunteering for a year, I started a confidence course which I've done before but thought I'd give it another go. Me and mum went to Sudbury on the bus which was good. I took part in more research,went to a jumble sale and had a roast dinner at the bull.

October

Me and my mum went on holiday to the Isle of Wight which was really good we stayed in Shanklin and the hotel was called the Shanklin hotel. We had bed, breakfast and dinner. We went out on excursions to the Needles, Ryde, Cowes and on our free day we looked around Shanklin. The weather was good, nice and sunny until the day home when it rained but that didn't matter.

November

I started going to a job club not much else happened this month.

December

Me and my mum went to a Christmas carol concert which was good.We went to the bull for a Christmas meal,we went to Appletree's for breakfast and whispers for my 34th birthday. We went round my sister's and her partner for festive afternoon tea.

Thanks for stopping by.

LIFE WITH FRAGILE X SYNDROME AGE 33

I last wrote a blog post on this when I was 31 so I thought it was time to write an updated one.

Job Hunting

This is frustrating, I've struggled with job hunting since school/college and I've only had 4 paid jobs which were all temporary and led to nothing. I didn't like 3 of them as one was in Chelmsford a Christmas job, the other Christmas job was in Braintree and I had another temp job also in Braintree and my last job was in Halstead which was better but again it was only temp. I've never really had support when it comes to job hunting the jobcentre have been awful when I was on jobseekers I was sanctioned a lot, someone came to my house which was horrible. They don't help people with disabilities at all I was picked on, had some horrible advisors and no help at all. When one of my jobs ended I had to reluctantly go back to the place of doom aka the jobcentre and go on a new benefit which was universal credit and I've been on it since. I am currently getting help from another company which started last year which is going okay and it has been helpful but I am looking into other options as applying for retail is pointless now. I need to try other things and widen my search and see what's out there. Job hunting has been so difficult for me and I don't understand why I can't get a job? It's unfair the way things are, the way I've been treated in the past and lack of support. There needs to be more help and guidance for people with learning disabilities who can work and want to work.

Confidence

I have gained confidence through volunteering and I do feel more confident but I also have the fear of the unknown when it comes to trying new things. I need to work on that and think actually I will try and if I don't like it then I can stop and find something else.

Volunteering

I started volunteering again because I felt at the time I wasn't any nearer to finding a job and I've been there since September last year. It's going well, I've met new people, talk to people and it gets me out the house for a few hours a week.

Making Friends

I don't have any friends and sometimes it's hard because I do wish I had maybe one or two friends. As I've got older it is more difficult to make friends, I don't keep in contact with anyone from school or college. I tried to make friends through a service that helped people with disabilities to meet people and while I did somethings through it, I didn't make friends and I stopped using the service and it's since going to close. I thought if I got a job I'd make friends but that doesn't always happen either.

Thanks for reading.

DAY OUT TO WALTON ON THE NAZE

I went to Walton with my mum on the bus from Colchester we walked along the sea front, took some photos, the tide was in and we had fish and chips and an ice cream. We waited for the next bus back to Colchester but it didn't turn up so we had to get the train. We could've waited for the next bus but it was another 2 hours and who knows if that would've turned up.

Thanks for reading.

DAY OUT TO MALDON

I went to Maldon for the day with my mum and I thought I'd share what we did. We walked along the promenade, had fish and chips, well I had battered sausage and chips! I took some pictures, we looked in the charity shops but didn't find anything and looked in some other shops.

 

Thanks for reading.